Trisha Paytas: The Years That Nearly Destroyed Me

Trisha Paytas opens up about her rise to internet fame, childhood, relationships and mental health, revealing the experiences behind one of the internet’s most recognisable personalities. She reflects on feeling unwanted growing up, her complicated relationship with her dad, and why she spent so much of her life searching for someone to love her.

Trisha looks back on moving to LA to pursue fame, her experiences with sex work, deliberately making herself an internet spectacle and the terrifying time she was held captive in a man's basement. She also speaks candidly about her darkest period, her mental health struggles and being admitted to a psychiatric hospital.

She opens up about meeting her husband Moses on the H3 dating show, finding stability, struggling to conceive and becoming a mother. Trisha reflects on how much her life has changed, before reading a deeply personal letter from Moses that brings her to tears.

Trisha Paytas, We Need To Talk


This episode includes discussions of childhood sexual abuse, sexual assault, substance abuse, suicidal ideation and disordered eating. If you or someone you know has been affected by any of the topics in this episode, please watch with care. You can find support resources in the links below:

Women’s Aid: https://linkly.link/2xInX
Refuge: https://linkly.link/2xIqZ
MIND: https://linkly.link/2dx8b
Samaritans: https://linkly.link/30GX3


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Follow Trisha here:
https://www.instagram.com/trishapaytas
https://www.tiktok.com/@trishlikefish88

Buy Trisha’s Book: Crying On The Kitchen Floor:
https://www.simonandschuster.co.uk/books/Crying-on-the-Kitchen-Floor/Trisha-Paytas/9781398566774


00:00 Intro
01:34 Trisha's Childhood in Illinois
02:54 Trisha's Childhood Photo
05:41 Trisha's Early Love of Film and TV
08:37 Trisha and Her Father
11:12 How an Absent Father Affected Trisha
12:34 Films That Influenced Trisha
16:33 Trisha's Teenage Ambitions
20:22 Trisha's Lonely Childhood
22:57 Trisha's Experience of School Abuse
27:17 Moving to Los Angeles After High School
33:58 How Trisha Made Money in LA
39:42 How Trisha Started Sex Work
50:28 Trisha's Kidnapping Experience
57:14 Trisha and Anthony Michael Hall
01:04:01 Trisha's Relationship History
01:07:20 Huel Ad
01:08:29 Anthropic Ad
01:09:20 Shopify Ad
01:10:24 Trisha and Anthony Michael Hall's Breakup
01:17:13 Trisha's YouTube Breakthrough
01:20:45 Trisha's Mukbang Videos
01:26:04 Trisha on Celebrity Big Brother
01:30:12 Trisha and Jason Nash's Relationship
01:34:30 Trisha and Aaron Carter
01:43:06 Trisha's Psychiatric Hospital Stay
01:47:10 Why Trisha Started OnlyFans
01:48:40 Trisha and Husband Moses
01:56:49 Trisha's Career and Family Life
01:57:35 Trisha's Children
01:59:29 Trisha's Family Photo
01:59:40 Trisha's Career Success as a Mum
02:02:20 Trisha's Family Photo
02:04:48 Trisha Read a Letter from Moses
02:07:28 Paul's Final Takeaways



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