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Heavy Boobs (feat. Rachel Bloom)
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BUY ON ITUNES: https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/hea...

Starring Rachel Bloom
Featuring Aleka Emerson, Alexia Silvaggio, Latrice Gregory and Adama Elder
Written by Rachel Bloom and Adam Schlesinger
Directed by Alex Hardcastle
Choreographed by Kathryn Burns
Cinematography by Todd Dos Reis


Rebecca:
I got them heavy boobs, heavy
Boobs, dense like dying stars.
I got them heavy boobs, heavy
Boobs, I can't run real far.

Let me break down what I just
Said (aah aah). Each of my double
D's has the volume of a toddler's
Head. Not bitchin' bout my boobies
They look super fly in shirts (aah aah).

But if I swung them in your face
You'd be like "omigod that hurts."
I'm blind. Holy crap. I literally can't
See. I have permanent retinal damage.

I'm suing you and your heavy boobies.
Heavy boobs. Heavy boobs. Dense
Like dying stars. I got them Heavy
Boobs, heavy boobs -
They each have their own memoirs.

What you gotta know is that boobs
May be where it's at (aah aah). But
If you cut them open they're just
Sacks of yellow fat. Stuff falls into
My bra, it's a little bit of a drag (aah aah).
But when I got to bed at night it's
Like opening a Mary Poppins bag.

Dancers:
Whee, candy! and, pennies!

Rebecca:
I got them heavy boobs, heavy
Boobs, dense like dying stars.
I got them heavy boobs, heavy
Boobs. Don't need an airbag in
My car.

Here is a list of all of the objects
That I can hold under my boobs:

Stapler, 10 pencils, paperback
Copy of "Arabian Nights", dog bowl,
Remote control, hard back copy of
"Wuthering Heights".

Rebecca (spoken):
See, when a star's mass is not high
enough to become a neutron star,
it will expand into a red giant, and if
the red giant has insufficient mass to
generate carbon, an inert mass builds
up in it's center and the star becomes
a dense white dwarf. And so, yeah, that's
what my boobs are like.

Rebecca:
I got them heavy boobs, heavy
Boobs, dense like a white dwarf.
I got them heavy boobs, heavy
Boobs --
They'd be a catch at Fishermans'
Wharf. I got them heavy boobs,
Heavy boobs.

Don't ever forget that these heavy
Boobs, heavy boobs are just sacks
Of yellow fat. Like the stuffing
Of a couch. They're just sacks of
Yellow fat.

Technically meant to feed a baby.
They're just sacks of yellow fat.
Tags
Boobs, Rachel Bloom, You Can Touch My Boobies
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